Friday, February 20, 2015

I dreamed I saw you again; you were working at some dive bar. I never knew you very well at all, but you seemed to be doing fine. I used to frequent the dive bar, and you must've gotten laid off from your real bar and then started working there. You took our orders and smiled, and rolled up your sleeves. Anyways, the place was a shithole, even more than how it is in real life. There were rats the size of dogs scurrying about. They would lift up entire tables and make off with them.


I dreamed I became the governor of New Jersey through some freak election trick. I had been running against one of the guys from "Buena Vista Social Club," and won handily. I had all these ideas, but no idea how to implement them. I stood in an elevator, humming to myself. Nobody who I was friendly with before the election wanted to talk to me anymore; I was hated.

Oh well. I walked out of the elevator and to my first press conference.


I dreamed my pal Dennis coerced me into trying to save some hostages who were being held somewhere the Middle East. We were gonna do some comedy and sneak behind enemy lines. We were gonna use our acting skills--for good! I was very afraid. We weren't that good of actors. We parachuted into enemy territory, practicing our lines. We were terrible. I was so afraid, I actually woke up.

Sunday, January 11, 2015

I dreamed I was swimming off the Ocean Grove beach and dived down, down, down. A shark appeared and started biting my leg. This was one of those dreams where you actually feel the biting, and I woke up. Probly sleeping on my leg weird.


I dreamed I was in some kind of spaceship that had landed on the moon. The interior was like one of the old brick-and-mortar schoolhouses you get here in Jersey. There were hundreds of us in there; the school marms were evacuating the joint. There were three other spaceships nearby that we were to evacuate to--these would fly us back to Earth. But you had to run outside on the inhospitable planet surface to get to them, just holding your breath. I didn't want to go. I got separated from Jenofur and the kids. They were ushered off to another spaceship. Finally an old giant of a woman, one of the school chaperones, grabbed me in a modified headlock and dragged me, gasping, across the dusty planet to the waiting spaceship.


I dreamed I joined the local fire department. The firehouse was a towering, open-air wooden structure, like a three-story barn. Chickens and all. Old engines just lying around. Everybody had mustaches.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

I dreamed that I lived in a castle-like hotel, made of wrought iron and large, heavy stones. There lived at least two sets of strange beings inside this hotel. The Piemen were these anthropomorphic pies that had exceedingly well-groomed mustaches and pranced about bearing large trays, feeding the hotel's guests. On the other side were the Thieves, who were like garden gnomes clad in heavy armor who would steal food from atop the Piemen's trays. They had an arrangement whereby they then split the food with the Piemen, who were abetting their thievery.

Things went south when the hotel lost business. Less guests meant less food, less food meant conflict between the Piemen and the Thieves. I was among the latter, and at one point the Piemen declared all-out war, pinning three of us in the attic of the hotel. They then set fire to the upper floors. Us Thieves, not wanting to die, flung ourselves out the window and proceeded to slide down roofs and gutters, desperately trying to escape.